An Australian tour guide was showing a group of American tourists the Top End.On there way to Kakado he was describing the abilities of the Australian Aborigine to track man or beast over land through the air,under the sea.
The Americans were incredulous
Then later that day,the tour rounded a bend on the highway and discovered, lying in the middle of the road an Aborigine.
He had one ear pressed to the white line whilst his left leg was held high in the air
The tour stopped and the guide and the tourists gathered around the prostrate Aborigine.
"Jacky"said the tour guide,"what are you tracking and what are you listening for?"
The Aborigine replied,"Down the road about 25 miles is a1971 Valiant Ute.
Its red, The left tyre is bald,The front end is out of whack and it has dents in every panel.
There are 9Blackfellas in the back,all drinking warm sherry.
There are 3Kangaroos on the roof rack and 6 dogs on the front seat."
The American tourists moved forward, astounded by this pricise and detailed knowledge.
"Dammit man how do you know all that?"asked one!
The Aborigine replied,
"I FELL OUT OF THE FRIGGIN THING ABOUT HALF HOUR AGO!"
Little Johnny had been bringing his drawings home from kindergarten every day since he started a month agoEach day his mother admired the pictures and hung them on the refrigerator.
One thing started bothering her. Little Johnny only used black and browns for his drawings. Fearing a problem and not wanting it to get worse, she decided to take him to a child psychologist.The psychologist delicately went to work. He gave Little Johnny a battery of psychological tests. He chatted with Little Johnny. Everything seemed perfectly normal. Every day for two weeks, the tests continued. Yet everyday, Little Johnny continued to bring home drawings in only blacks and browns.Frustrated at not being able to get to the root of the problem and fearful that something was terribly wrong, the child psychologist decided to give Little Johnny some paper and a box of crayons and observe what happened.Little Johnny opened the box of crayons and said, "Oh, Boy! A new box of crayons! At school we only have old boxes. The only ones left in mine are black and brown!"
Labels: Humour - Aussie