Tuesday, September 01, 2009

Eye Surgery

Hello everyone, Well as you can see I have been out of action for the last few days, after having cataract surgery at Wangaratta hospital. Carol has been staying with me since my birthday, looking after me & making sure I dont do anything I'm not meant to be doing . I left hospital with my eye taped shut and and had to leave this shield on till I saw my specialist the next morning when it was removed, I could read most of the chart on the wall , and only had to wear the shield for 3 nights and have to use drops 4 times a day for 3 weeks. Next Tuesday I have to go back and have a small cyst like lesion removed from under my right eye and healed before the Dr will do my right cataract, then hopefully I will only need glasses for reading.

OHHHH dear .. Carol just drove in from going down the shops .. YES I'm in a bit of trouble, just got caught out ... not meant to be on the computer and its time for my drops.

Just a couple of jokes tonight, Ill be around to visit you all as soon as I'm able.





~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The Farmer


One day a farmer's donkey fell down into awell. The animal cried piteously for hours as the farmer tried to figure out what to do.Finally, he decided the animal was old, and the well needed to be covered up anyway;
it just wasn't worth it to retrieve the donkey.He invited all his neighbors to come over and help him.




They all grabbed a shovel and began to shovel dirt into the well. At first, the donkey realized what was happening and cried horribly. Then, to everyone's amazement he quieted down.


A few shovel loads later, the farmer finally looked down the well. He was astonished at what he saw. With each shovel of dirt that hit his back, the donkey was doing something amazing.


He would shake it off and take a step up. As the farmer's neighbors continued to shovel dirt on top of the animal, he would shake it off and take a step up.


Pretty soon, everyone was amazed as the donkey stepped up over the edge of the well and happily trotted off!Life is going to shovel dirt on you, all kinds of dirt.


The trick to getting out of the well is to shake it off and take a step up. Each of our troubles is a stepping stone. We can get out of the deepest wells just by not stopping,never giving up! Shake it off and take a step up.


NOW ............ Enough of that crap . . The donkey later came back,
and bit the farmer who had tried to bury him.
The gash from the bite got infected and
the farmer eventually died in agony from septic shock.



MORAL FROM TODAY'S LESSON:


When you do something wrong, try to cover your ass


,as it always comes back to bite you.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


One afternoon a lawyer was riding in his limousine when he saw two men
along the roadside eating grass. Disturbed, he ordered his driver to
stop and he got out to investigate.
He asked one man, "Why are you eating grass?"
"We don't have any money for food," the poor man replied.
"We have to eat grass."
"Well, then, you can come with me to my house and I'll feed you," the
lawyer said.
"But sir, I have a wife and two children with me. They are over
there,under that tree."
"Bring them along," the lawyer replied.
Turning to the other poor man he stated, "You come with us, too."
The second man, in a pitiful voice, then said, "But sir, I also ha ve
a wife and SIX children with me!"
"Bring them all, as well," the lawyer answered.
They all entered the car, which was no easy task, even for a car as
large as the limousine was.
Once underway, one of the poor fellows turned to the lawyer and said,
"Sir, you are too kind Thank you for taking all of us with you."
The lawyer replied, "Glad to do it. You'll really love my place.
The grass is almost a foot high."


~~~~~~~~



Wisdom of Older Women
After being marriedfor 42 years I took a carefull look at my wife one day and said."Honey, 42 years ago we had a cheap apartment A cheap car, slept on a sofa bed and watched a 10 inch black and white television,, But i got to sleep every night with A hot 19year old girl.


NOW I HAVE A $500,000 HOME, A $45,000 CAR, NICE BIG BED AND PLASMA SCREEN TV, But im sleeping with a 61year old women.


"It seems to me that your not holding up your side of things."


MY WIFE IS A VERY REASONABLE WOMAN.


She told me to go out and find a hot 19year old girl. , And she would make sure that I would once again be living in a cheap apartment,driving a cheap car, sleeping on a sofa bed and watching a 10 inch black and white television ONCE AGAIN BE LIVING IN A CHEAP APARTMENT, DRIVING A CHEAP CAR, SLEEPING ON A SOFA BED AND WATCHING A 10-INCH BLACK AND WHITE TV.
AREN'T OLDER WOMEN GREAT?




THEY REALLY KNOW HOW TO SOLVE YOUR MID-LIFE CRISIS.
~~~~~~~~~~~~


Labels:

16 Comments:

Blogger Gattina said...

Good, that it all went so smooth, it's always very delicate to have something done to your eye. I hope that now you will see like an eagle !

September 02, 2009 4:31 pm  
Blogger Lady Di Tn said...

Glad to see Carol is takin good care of yawl. My MIL does not wear glasses any time since her surgery.
Good jokes for future art venture luncheon. Peace

September 03, 2009 12:20 am  
Blogger Merle said...

Dear Jan ~~ I am so glad you got through the surgery well, although that was a surprise. Good on Carol looking after you. I hope they can do the other eye soon and you will be good as new. Do be careful not to spoil the surgeon's good work.
Take great care, Much love, Merle.

Hi to Carol.

September 03, 2009 11:34 am  
Blogger Puss-in-Boots said...

Hi Jeanette. I've seen plenty of patients with patches where I used to work. Glad you had the cataract surgery done. Jane and I have finally persuaded (bullied?) Ken into having his cataract done. So he goes in on 17th of this month. He won't know himself...silly old bugger. (He agrees with me...lol).

September 03, 2009 1:54 pm  
Blogger Peter said...

Glad to hear your cataract surgery went well Jan, mine was postponed for another year.

September 03, 2009 4:20 pm  
Blogger Hootin' Anni said...

OMGoodness!!! I do hope you will heal well and the recovery time is short!! And don't worry about us and visiting....you take care of YOU!!!!! We'll be here.

September 03, 2009 9:05 pm  
Blogger Gina E. said...

Ugh, I HATE having anything done to my eyes, even the glaucoma and cataract tests the option does every year! It is always such a relief to hear that my eyes are healthy again. Glad to hear yours are fixed up now.
That joke about the lawyer picking up the poor people was sick..."long grass at my place" - I'll bet there are actually some people around who would do that!

September 04, 2009 11:39 pm  
Blogger PEA said...

Hello dear Jen:-)

I've been missing in action as well this past week, just been so busy, have had little time for the computer! I'm so glad to hear your first cataract surgery went well...my mom has to go for hers near the end of September. She's anxious to get it done since it really affects her sight. Just know that I'm thinking of you and prayers are being said.

Loved the jokes, thank you for the chuckles:-) xoxo

September 06, 2009 3:53 am  
Blogger Margaret Cloud said...

Glad to hear your surgery turned out okay. Loved all the stories, especially the farmer and donkey. Also glad you have someone to help out. Have a great Sunday.

September 06, 2009 9:53 am  
Blogger Jim said...

Hi Jan, it is almost too late, but here goes anyway:
GET WELL SOON! GET WELL SOON!
GET WELL SOON! GET WELL SOON!
GET WELL SOON! GET WELL SOON!
GET WELL SOON! GET WELL SOON!
GET WELL SOON! GET WELL SOON!
GET WELL SOON! GET WELL SOON!
GET WELL SOON! GET WELL SOON!

You sure do look different with the bandage on that one eye. Like me when I used to wear glasses, they just add to your dignified look.
Will you be able to toss them after the second eye is done?

Your donkey story is good. It almost sounds like an Aesop Fable but I don't know all of them and hadn't heard this before. You might have Aesop writing talent!

I know Cazz will do a good job keeping you resting like you are supposed to be. You should mind her. And she can even update your blog.
Or did she forget her password? Adi keeps forgetting hers.
Cheers,
..

September 07, 2009 8:24 am  
Blogger Janice said...

Hi Jeanette,

I'm glad the surgery went well, and you'll be able to see better too.

I hope Carol didn't scold you too much.

Take care,
Janice~

September 07, 2009 3:21 pm  
Blogger Red Clover said...

I hope everything with the post-surgery is going well! Also, congrats on the birthday bash! You Australians sure love a good party!

September 08, 2009 3:14 am  
Blogger Gledwood said...

Hi Jan
I'm having a lot of trouble with this computer so I hope this gets through. Long time no see/hear but I'm glad to hear the eye surgery went OK. I'll try and get in touch again when I've a better connection...

Take care and all the very best to you

Gleds
xx

September 08, 2009 6:59 am  
Blogger Tinsie said...

Hope your eye heals well and soon!

September 08, 2009 6:53 pm  
Blogger Pamela said...

that lawyer joke was so funny -- I'm going to remember that one.

Glad to see you had your surgery. Let us know how well you can see!

September 10, 2009 3:06 pm  
Anonymous eye surgery oakland said...

great you have done the great work and i assure you that you feel really happy after the eye surgery or we can say that when the surgery completed in that time you feel happy and comfortable about your decision. there is a video that i found on the net and i feel really happy to see that video so check this out and you guys really feel happy....
http://www.motionbox.com/videos/7a96d7b71a1fe0c5f5

January 07, 2010 12:26 am  

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