A Little Humour Tonight

A farmer went out one day and bought a brand new stud rooster for his chicken coop.
the new rooster struts over to the old rooster and says, "OK old timer, time for you to retire.
"The old rooster replies, "Come on, surely you cannot handle ALL of these hens.
Look what it has done to me.
Can't you just let me have the two old hens over in the corner?"
The young rooster says, "Beat it! You are washed up and I am taking over.."
The old rooster says, "I tell you what, young stud. I will race you around the farmhouse.
Who ever wins gets exclusive domain over the entire chicken coop."
The young rooster laughs. "You know you don't stand a chance, old man. So, just to be fair, I will give you a head start."
The old rooster takes off running.
About 15 seconds later the young rooster takes off running after him.
They round the front porch of the farmhouse and the young rooster has closed the gap.
He is only about 5 feet behind the old rooster and gaining fast.
The farmer, meanwhile, is sitting in his usual spot on the front porch when he sees the roosters go running by. He grabs his shotgun and - BOOM - he blows the young rooster to bits.
The farmer sadly shakes his head and says, "Damn.....third gay rooster I bought this month."
Moral of this story?
.1) You don't get old being a fool!
2) Age, skill, and treachery will always overcome youth and arrogance!
3) Don't mess with OLD TIMERS!

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A dumb blonde died and went to Heaven. When she got to the Pearly Gates, she met Saint Peter who said, "Before you get to come into Heaven, you have to pass a test."
"OH, NO!" exclaimed the blonde.
But Saint Peter said not to worry, because he would make it an easy test. "Who was God's son?" asked Saint Peter.
The dumb blonde thought for a few minutes and replied, "Andy."
"Andy? That's interesting. What made you say that?" inquired Saint Peter.
Then the blonde started to sing, "Andy walks with me. Andy talks with me. Andy tells me..."

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A fireman is at the station house working outside on the fire truck when he notices little Johnny next door. Little Johnny is in a little red wagon with little ladders hung off the side. He is wearing a fireman's hat and has the wagon tied to a dog. The fireman says "Hey little boy. What are you doing?" Little Johnny says "I'm pretending to be a fireman and this is my fire truck!" The fireman walks over to take a closer look. "Little boy, that sure is a nice fire truck!" the fireman says. "Thanks mister", says little Johnny. The fireman looks a little closer and notices little Johnny has tied the dog to the wagon by its testicles. "Son", says the fireman, "I don't want to tell you how to run your fire truck, but if you were to tie that rope around the dog's neck I think you could go faster." Little Johnny says, "You're probably right mister, but then I wouldn't have a siren

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,

THE POSITIVE SIDE OF LIFE:

Living on Earth is expensive,
but it does include a free trip
around the sun every year.

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How long a minute is
depends on what side of the
bathroom door you're on.
Birthdays are good for you;
the more you have,
the longer you live.
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Happiness comes through doors you
didn't even know you left open.
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Ever notice that the people who are late
are often much jollier
than the people who have to wait for them?

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