Thursday, September 28, 2006

GAS

I went into the Service station today and Asked for five dollars worth of gas.
The clerk farted and gave me a receipt.
(The actual cost to fill my car today was $82.00)
____________________
What Starts with F and ends with K
A first-grade teacher, Ms. Brooks, was having trouble with one of her students.
The teacher asked, "Harry, what's your problem?"
Harry answered, "I'm too smart for the 1st grade.
My sister is in the 3rd grade and I'm smarter than she is! I think I should be in
the 3rd grade too!"
Ms. Brooks had had enough. She took Harry to the principal's office.
While Harry waited in the outer office, the teacher explained to the
principal what the situation was.
The principal told Ms. Brooks he would give the boy a test.
If he failed to answer any of his questions he was to go back to the 1st grade and behave.
She agreed.
Harry was brought in and the conditions were explained to him and he agreed to take the test. Principal: "What is 3 x 3?"
Harry: "9."
Principal: "What is 6 x 6?"
Harry: "36."
And so it went with every question the principal thought a 3rd grader should know.
The principal looks at Ms. Brooks and tells her, "I think Harry can go to the 3rd grade."
Ms. Brooks says to the principal, "Let me ask him some questions."
The principal and Harry both agreed.
Ms. Brooks asks, "What does a cow have four of that I have only two of?"
Harry, after a moment: "Legs."
Ms. Brooks: "What is in your pants that you have but I do not have?"
The principal wondered why would she ask such a question!
Harry replied: "Pockets."
Ms. Brooks: "What does a dog do that a man steps into?"
Harry: "Pants."
Ms. Brooks: What starts with a C, ends with a T, is hairy, oval, delicious and contains thin, whitish liquid?
" Harry: "Coconut."
The principal sat forward with his mouth hanging open.
Ms. Brooks: "What goes in hard and pink then comes out soft and sticky?"
The principal's eyes opened really wide and before he could stop the answer,
Harry replied, "Bubble gum."
Ms. Brooks: "What does a man do standing up, a woman does sitting down and a dog does on three legs?
" Harr:y "Shake hands."
The principal was trembling.
Ms. Brooks: "What word starts with an 'F' and ends in 'K' that means a lot of heat and excitement?
" Harry: "Firetruck."
The principal breathed a sigh of relief and told the teacher, "Put Harry in the fifth-grade, I got the last seven questions wrong......
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A LESSON IN LOGIC
A bus station is where a bus stops.
A train station is where a train stops.
On my desk, I have a work station....What more can I say........

16 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

The cost of Gas has gone up!!!!!

September 29, 2006 1:15 am  
Blogger PEA said...

I know, it's ridiculous how much gas is but it's actually lower here right now than it was a year ago...thank God for small mercies!! Love the joke LOL!!!

September 29, 2006 8:54 am  
Blogger Cazz said...

hey mum,

I was a little lucky this morning, filled up @$1.24lt only cost $73.00 !!!

I Need a 2nd job just so I can afford to go to the 1st job !!

Cazz
xxooxx

September 29, 2006 1:33 pm  
Anonymous Merle said...

Hello Jeanette ~ Thanks for your comments, glad you enjoyed the post.
I liked the joke a lot. Take care, Merle

September 29, 2006 4:49 pm  
Blogger Meow said...

The price of petrol is astronomical, although it has dropped a little bit lately.
Hope you have a great weekend.
Take care, Meow

September 29, 2006 10:32 pm  
Blogger LittleJen said...

Very good joke mum, clever answers.

Luv Jo

p.s. Tim lost another front tooth today he looks so cute got both missing now the BIG gap

September 29, 2006 10:37 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Everything was really funny except the price of your fuel. Thanks for visits on my site. Cheers Margaret

September 30, 2006 12:06 am  
Blogger Sonia said...

Thanks Jeanette for stopping by my blog and leaving a comment and also thank you for added my blog on your links! I am honored and pleased!

September 30, 2006 4:41 am  
Blogger Gattina said...

I am happy to see that there is another woman in her 60 blogging ! You are the first I found (maybe some others just didn't mention their age) I already felt like a unic specie ! But thanks to Sonia's blogging birthday I found you.
Don't mention gaz ! You are still lucky. Here in Europe we pay
1.40 € (!) (about the same as a US$) for one liter (I think a gallon is about 4 l) It really becomes a luxury to drive a car !

September 30, 2006 1:47 pm  
Blogger Jim said...

A nice story. How could any of us ever get into the third grade nowadays?
They say our gas has gone down 63 cents in the last three weeks. I saw a lot for $2.03 a gallon, some are below 1.99.
It won't last.
..

September 30, 2006 3:15 pm  
Anonymous Merle said...

Hi Jan ~ Watching the start of the last quarter of the GF. Sydney have come up closer than all day. Thanks for your comments. Take care, Love, Merle.

September 30, 2006 4:57 pm  
Blogger Janice said...

Hi,

Good joke, and I think I read it on Merle's blog, but it's still funny--LOL.

Our gas here in the states actually has gone down, the lowest price in a year.

Janice~

September 30, 2006 5:08 pm  
Blogger Sonia said...

Hi Jeanette, me again.
Thank you so much for your congratulations for my blog anniversary! I am glad I meet you!

October 01, 2006 12:37 am  
Blogger DellaB said...

Hi Jen - great post, very funny jokes - thanks

I'd stay and chat, but I am off to visit Gattina - who said:
"I am happy to see that there is another woman in her 60 blogging ! You are the first I found ..."

Boy, is she in for a surprise!
;-)
Della

October 01, 2006 2:53 pm  
Blogger willowtree said...

Very funny, I'd heard it a long time ago, but had forgot all the answers so it was like the first time again. A bit like Alzheimers I suppose.

October 01, 2006 5:35 pm  
Blogger Peggy said...

I just love your jokes!

October 02, 2006 3:17 pm  

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