Thursday, August 28, 2008

A busy few days

Hi everyone,hope all well in your part of the world as it is with me.
Tuesday was a fun day we had our opening day of Lawn bowls for season 2008/2009.
we had a game of social bowls followed by lunch a few speeches and a few jokes were told to end the day.
Then was of to Visit my Daughter Donna for a couple of hours as it was her birthday. before heading back to the club for Indoor carpet bowls to be a scorer for the nights competion.
Wednesday Back to club for a game of Lawn bowls followed by lunch.
Today Thursday Donna picked me up to go to her friends were a few other friends arrived for a little pampering beauty treatment and a cuppa, before heading to "Coops"for a lovely birthday lunch with the girls..
A lovely lunch was had by all.
Tomorrow im of to help my sister plant a few succulents in a n old wheelbarrow. ill take my camera.
Well Im of for an early night, and I promise to visit you all in the next few days.
Now a few Jokes...

"$20.00"

You're worth it! Sometimes we just need to be reminded! A well-known speaker started off his seminar by holding up a $20.00 bill.

In the room of 200, he asked,
'Who would like this $20 bill?' Hands started going up.
He said, 'I am going to give this $20 to one of you but first, let me do this.
He proceeded to crumple up the $20 dollar bill.
He then asked, 'Who still wants it?' Still the hands were up in the air.
Well, he replied,
'What if I do this?'
And he dropped it on the ground and started to grind it into the floor with his shoe.
He picked it up, now crumpled and dirty.
'Now, who still wants it?' Still the hands went into the air.

'My friends, we have all learned a very valuable lesson.

No matter what I did to the money, you still wanted it because it did not decrease in value.
It was still worth $20.
Many times in our lives, we are dropped, crumpled, and ground into the dirt by the decisions we make and the circumstances that come our way.
We feel as though we are worthless.
But no matter what has happened or what will happen, you will never lose your value.
Dirty or clean, crumpled or finely creased, you are still priceless to those who DO LOVE you.
The worth of our lives comes not in what we do or who we know, but by WHO WE ARE and WHOSE WE ARE.
You are special .

Don't EVER forget it.

Count your blessings, not your problems.
And remember that amateurs built the ark
Professionals built the Titanic.'
~~~~~~~~

Wedding of the Wongs
Su Wong marries Lee Wong.
The next year, the Wongs have a new baby.
The nurse brings over a lovely, healthy, bouncy,but definitely a Caucasian, WHITE baby boy.
'Congratulations,' says the nurse to the new parents.
Well Mr. Wong, what will you and Mrs. Wong name the baby?'
The puzzled father looks at his new baby boy and says,'Well, two Wong's don't make a white,so I think we will name him...
Are you ready for this?
Sum Ting Wong

~~~~~
A woman's garden is growing beautifully but the darn tomatoes won't ripen.

There's a limit to the number of uses for green tomatoes and she's getting tired of it.

So she goes to her neighbor and says,"Your tomatoes are ripe, mine are green. What can I do about it?"
Her neighbor replies,"Well, it may sound absurd but here's what to do.
Tonight there's no moon. After dark go out into your garden and take all your clothes off. Tomatoes can see in the dark and they'll be embarrassed and blush.
In the morning they'll all be red, you'll see."
She says Well, what the heck it can't hurt to try it.
Next day her neighbor asks how it worked.
"So-so," she answers.
"The tomatoes are still green but the cucumbers are all four inches longer."

~~~~~~~~


Why parents drink The boss wondered why one of his most valued employee had not phoned in sick one day. Having an urgent problem with one of the main computers, he dialed the employee's home phone number and was greeted with a child's whisper. 'Hello ?'
'Is your daddy home?' he asked.
' Yes ,' whispered the small voice.
'May I talk with him?'
The child whispered, 'No.'
Surprised and wanting to talk with an adult, the boss asked, 'Is your Mommy there?'
'Yes.'
'May I talk with her?'
Again the small voice whispered, 'No .'
Hoping there was somebody with whom he could leave a message, the boss asked, 'Is anybody else t here?'
'Yes ,' whispered the child, 'a policeman '. Wondering what a cop would be doing at his employee's home, the boss asked, 'May I speak with the policeman?'
' No, he's busy ', whispered the child.
'Busy doing what?'
'Talking to Daddy and Mommy and the Fireman ,' came the whispered answer.
Growing more worried as he heard a loud noise in the background through the earpiece on the phone, the boss asked, 'What is that noise?'
'A helicopter ' answered the whispering voice.
'What is going on there?' demanded the boss, now truly apprehensive.
Again, whispering, the child answered, The search team just landed a helicopter . '
Alarmed, concerned and a little frustrated the boss asked, 'What are they searching for?'
Still whispering, the young voice replied with a muffled giggle...
'ME .'

~~~~~~


A minister decided to do something a little different one Sunday morning.

He said 'Today, in church, I am going to say a single word and you are going to help me preach.Whatever single word I say, I want you to sing whatever hymn that comes to your mind'

The pastor shouted out 'CROSS. Immediately the congregation started singing in unison, 'THE OLD RUGGED CROSS.

'The pastor hollered out 'GRACE.' The congregation began to sing 'AMAZING GRACE, how sweet the sound.

'The pastor said 'POWER.' The congregation sang 'THERE IS POWER IN THE BLOOD.

'The Pastor said 'SEX' The congregation fell into total silence.

Everyone was in shock.

They all nervously began to look around at each other afraid to say anything.

Then all of a sudden, way from in the back of the church, A little old 87 year old grandmother stood up and began to sing 'MEMORIES.

Love Little Old Ladies.

Laugh... It burns calories

~~~~~~~`

Hope these brightened someones day ..Cheers \_/ \_/ \_/

Labels:

18 Comments:

Blogger smilnsigh said...

You're having a great time, as usual. :-)

Wishing you a happy 'Tasha Tudor Remembrance Day In Blog Land,' Aug. 28th.

Miss Mari-Nanci
Smilnsigh blog

August 28, 2008 10:59 pm  
Blogger Gattina said...

You are quite busy with bowling, that's nice ! It's ages I haven't played but I love it !

August 28, 2008 11:18 pm  
Blogger Peggy said...

wow, you sure are one busy lady but getting to have lots of fun in the process! Have a nice weekend

August 29, 2008 12:06 am  
Anonymous Diane of Crafty Passions said...

Wonderful post!
Diane

August 29, 2008 1:43 am  
Blogger PEA said...

You certainly have been busy but it's a "fun" busy:-) The very best of luck to you with the new season of Lawn bowling...we don't have that here so I find it quite fascinating when you post about it!

Happy Birthday to your daughter Donna, sounds like you had a lovely time celebrating her special day:-)

Loved the jokes...the one about the tomatoes and cucumbers just about had me rolling on the floor laughing! LOL Hmmmm, I wonder if I should try that with my garden!!!! lol xoxo

August 29, 2008 8:38 am  
Blogger Janice said...

Happy Bowling.

I loved the memories joke.

Janice~

August 29, 2008 5:30 pm  
Blogger Gramma Ann said...

G'day, G'day,

I love the song, so stop by every so often to listen to it and read your blog. I skipped over here from Merle's blog.

Ann

August 30, 2008 1:43 am  
Blogger Hootin' Anni said...

G'day Jen! You sound like you've been very VERY busy. so I am guessing that you've been doing well? I haven't done much visiting time lately, but I'm going to try and be a good girl and get here more often.

Happy Birthday to Donna ---belated wishes, but still I do hope she had a great day!

I'm gonna go catch up on what I've been missing lately with you...and promise to return!

---

Have a super Friday evening [guess it's Saturday for you]. I'm running a little behind in my visiting this afternoon since I've been scrubbing and cleaning all day. It's done...now I'm gonna crash in front of the TV a while. :o)

August 30, 2008 7:27 am  
Blogger Maria said...

Hallo Jens, thank you for coming over to Vienna for a dogwalk...
I see that you are doing well, celebrating birthdays (all the time!!) and visitig and bowling and having fun! I love the song on your site, it makes us smile!
Have a nice weekend!
Hugs, Maria

August 31, 2008 1:51 am  
Blogger Heart of Rachel said...

Hi Jen. Lawn bowls sound interesting. I'm glad you have a fun and exciting activity that you enjoy.

Thanks for the sharing those funny jokes.

August 31, 2008 2:47 am  
Blogger Peter said...

That last joke brought back "Memories" of "Mammaries"
I'm tempted to try the new car out with a trip to Victoria... who knows might see you soon?

August 31, 2008 10:54 am  
Blogger sonia a.m. said...

Hi Jeanette,
Sounds you had a busy and great time! And jokes is always good!

PS: I would like to invite you to join Ecological Day, next September 2th. You can post on your blog a diversity of issues about the master theme of Ecology. I will open Mister Linky September 1th, 06:00 PM. Would be great if you join us!

Have a nice Sunday!

August 31, 2008 12:12 pm  
Blogger Merle said...

Dear Jan ~~ Great jokes - thanks for sharing them. I was interested in Peter's comment. I suggested he visit us in Victoria, so here's hoping- it seems ages since I saw him.New car might make the difference. Thanks for your comments, glad you liked the Teacher story and I hope there are some who care as much still working. We got a nice rain all day yesterday and few showers today. Beaut. Take care,dear friend
Love, Merle.abcdef

August 31, 2008 10:17 pm  
Blogger Kerri said...

If laughing burns calories I just lost a little weight :)
I especially liked "Why God made Mums", but there were some other beauties too.
Happy belated birthday Jen. Sounds like you've been having plenty of fun. Loved seeing those pictures of you and Merle.
Happy birthday to Donna too. You've been a busy girl!
Enjoy your bowls! My mum used to be good at bowling. She loved the game.

September 01, 2008 11:00 am  
Blogger Jim said...

Hi Jen, I'm glad your lawn bowl is getting all ready to start. I thought it maybe was still too cool.
I liked your lost child joke, I had forgotten the punch line!
..

September 01, 2008 2:56 pm  
Blogger Gwen said...

Hi Mate.
Great jokes, still having a giggle while writing this comment.
We open on the 4th september,but as you know not sure if I will start this time.
Will know more after the 16th,see ya soon . xx

September 01, 2008 10:57 pm  
Blogger bigbikerbob said...

Hi Jeannette, I Hope your keeping well, Enjoyed your jokes as always, keep up the good work.

September 03, 2008 7:55 pm  
Blogger Gina E. said...

Oh dear, Jen - I didn't get any further than the one about the tomatoes and the cucumbers - I'm still giggling! Wish Ken was awake; I'll have to try and remember to tell him in the morning. He'll choke over his cuppa...

September 06, 2008 1:02 am  

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