Thursday, May 08, 2008

The Spoon

Hi everyone, A quick post as im of to Melbourne tomorrow for a very busy few days , ill tell you all about that when I get home early next week..
.. I want to wish all Mothers A very happy Mothers day and hope you all have a wonderful day surrounded by family .
Mothers day here in Australia is celebrated the second sunday in May.
So I will leave you with A little humour ..

For all of you who frequent restaurants and understand the need for the service to be faster, this short story is a timeless lesson on how consultants can make a difference to an organization.
Last week, we took some friends out to a new restaurant and noticed that the waiter who took our order carried a spoon in his shirt pocket.
It seemed a little strange.
When another waiter brought our water, I noticed he also had a spoon in his shirt pocket.
Then I looked around and saw that all the staff had spoons in their pockets.
When the waiter came back to serve our soup I asked,
'Why the spoon?'
Well', he explained, 'the restaurant's owners hired Andersen Consulting to revamp all our processes.
After several months of analysis, they concluded that the spoon was the most frequently dropped utensil.
It represents a drop frequency of approximately 3 spoons per table per hour.
If our personnel are better prepared, we can reduce the number of trips back to the kitchen and save 15 man-hours per shift.'
As luck would have it, I dropped my spoon and he was able to replace it with his spare. 'I'll get another spoon next time! I go to the kitchen, instead of making an extra trip to get it right now.'
I was impressed..
I also noticed that there was a string hanging out of the waiter's fly..
Looking around, I noticed that all the waiters had the same string hanging from their flies.
So before he walked off, I asked the waiter,
'Excuse me,
but can you tell me why you have that string right there?' 'Oh, certainly!' Then he lowered his voice. 'Not everyone is so observant.
That consulting firm I mentioned also found out that we can save time in the restroom.
By tying this string to the tip of you know what, we can pull it out without touching it and eliminate the need to wash our hands, shortening the time spent in the restroom by 76.39 percent.
I asked 'After you get it out, how do you put it back?' 'Well,' he whispered, 'I don't know about the others,
but I use the spoon.'

Mums will truly appreciate this one...
. Cup of Tea
One day my mother was out and my dad was in charge of me.
I was maybe 2 1/2 years old and had just recovered from an accident.
Someone had given me a little 'tea set' as a get-well gift and it was one of my favorite toys.
Daddy was in the living room engrossed in the evening news when I brought Daddy a little cup of 'tea', which was just water.
After several cups of tea and lots of praise for such yummy tea, my Mom came home.
My Dad made her wait in the living room to watch me bring him a cup of tea, because it was 'just the cutest thing!' My Mom waited, and sure enough, here I come down the hall with a cup of tea for Daddy and she watches him drink it up.
Then she says, (as only a mother would know... :)'Did it ever occur to you that the only place she can reach to get water is the toilet?'

A nice, calm and respectable lady went into the pharmacy, walked up to the pharmacist, looked straight into his eyes, and said, 'I would like to buy some cyanide.
'The pharmacist asked, 'Why in the world do you need cyanide?'
The lady replied,
'I need it to poison my husband.'The pharmacist's eyes got big and he exclaimed,
'Lord have mercy!
I can't give you cyanide to kill your husband.
That's against the law!I'll lose my license!
They'll throw both of us in jail!
All kinds of bad things will happen.
Absolutely not! You CANNOT have any cyanide!'
The lady reached into her purse and pulled out a picture of her husband in bed with the pharmacist's wife.
The pharmacist looked at the picture and replied, 'Well now, that's different. You didn't tell me you had a prescription.'


You don't stop laughing because you grow old,
You grow old because you stop laughing.
A cheerful heart is good medicine,
but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.
Proverbs 17:22



Blogger PEA said...

Happy Mother's Day to you too, dear's celebrated the 2nd Sunday in May here as well:-) Have a safe trip to Melbourne!!

Loved the jokes...ROFL on the waiter and the spoon, omigosh that was too funny! I never expected that ending! lol xox

May 09, 2008 8:52 am  
Blogger bigbikerbob said...

Happy mothers day Jen, it was ages ago in the UK. Jokes are funny as usual.

May 09, 2008 9:03 am  
Blogger Pamela said...

Happy MOthers Day to you, too --
and thank you for helping to make my heart merry.

May 09, 2008 3:25 pm  
Blogger Renae said...

Wonderful Mothers Day wishes sent to you too Jen :-) Cheers my friend !!

May 10, 2008 1:25 am  
Blogger JunieRose2005 said...


Very funny jokes, Jen!!!
They all had me LOL!

Enjoy your trip>



May 11, 2008 3:41 am  
Blogger Janice said...

Hi Jeanette,

Happy Mother's day to you too.


May 11, 2008 2:46 pm  
Blogger Peggy said...

I just love coming here! I always leave laughing

May 12, 2008 12:11 am  
Blogger Merle said...

Hi Dear Jan ~~ I hope you had a Happy
Mother's Day, as I did. I sent you 2 e mails today and they were returned, saying your inbox was full. I hope all is well with you my friend.
Take care, and see you when you are home again. Love, Merle.

May 12, 2008 5:29 pm  
Blogger meggie said...

Wonderful Jen, & just what I needed as an antidote to my blues!!
Hugs to you!! XX

May 12, 2008 7:45 pm  
Blogger Heart of Rachel said...

Belated Happy Mother's Day Jen. I hope you had a lovely celebration.

I spent the day with my parents and my whole family.

May 13, 2008 4:49 am  
Blogger The Ramblin Irishman said...

A belated Mother's Day to you as well. You now have me watching waiters and waitresses with a renewed interest. I will have to ask where those spoons have been.

May 14, 2008 12:30 am  
Blogger Penless Thoughts said...

Love the spoon joke!!!!!!Have fun on your trip.

May 15, 2008 2:47 am  
Blogger Sonia A. Mascaro said...

Happy Mother's Day to you too, dear Jeanette! (Sorry my belated greetings).

May 15, 2008 12:19 pm  

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