How to plant a garden
A few more jokes tonight
NOW for a couple of Jokes
WHERE DO REDHEAD BABIES COME FROM?
After their baby was born, the panicked father went to see the Obstetrician.
Doctor," the man said, "I don't mind telling you, but I'm a Little upset because my daughter has red hair.
She can't possibly be mine."
"Nonsense," the doctor said. "Even though you and your wife both have black hair, one of your ancestors May have contributed red hair to the gene pool."
"It isn't possible," the man insisted. "This can't be, our families on both Sides had jet-black hair for generations."
"Well," said the doctor, "let me ask you this. How often u have sex?" The man seemed a bit ashamed.
"I've been working very hard for the past year.
We only made Love once or twice every few months."
Well, there you have it!"
The doctor said confidently. "It's rust."
You will be cut down to size.....even by a blonde!
The body builder takes off his shirt and the blonde says, "What a great chest you have.
"He tells her, "That's 100 lbs. of dynamite, baby.
"He takes off his pants and the blonde says, "What massive calves you have.
"The body builder tells her, "That's 100 lbs. of dynamite, baby.
"He then removes his underwear and the blonde goes running out of the apartment screaming in fear.
The body builder puts his clothes back on and chases after her.
He catches up to her and asks why she ran out of the apartment like that.
The blonde replies,
"I was afraid to be around all that dynamite after I saw how short the fuse was."
Little Johnny (fireman)
A man was walking on the sidewalk and noticed up ahead that Little Johnny was wearing a red fireman's hat and sitting in a red wagon.
It appeared that the wagon was being pulled slowly by a large Labrador Retriever. When he got closer to the lad, he noticed that Johnny had a rope tied around the dog's testicles, which probably accounted for why the dog was walking so gingerly.
Smiling, he spoke to the little boy, "That's really a nice fire engine you have there, son. But I'll bet the dog would pull you faster if you tied that rope around his neck."
"Yeah," Johnny replied, "but then I wouldn't have a siren."
Remember the five simple rules to be happy:
Free your heart from hatred
Free your mind from worries - Most never happen.
Live simply and appreciate what you have
Labels: Humour - Mixed