Thursday, June 29, 2006

A Little Bit of Humor

What marriage is about
He ordered one hamburger, one order of French fries and one drink.
The old man unwrapped the plain hamburger and carefully cut it in half.
He placed one half in front of his wife.
He then carefully counted out the French fries, dividing them into two piles and neatly placed one pile in front of his wife.
He took a sip of the drink, his wife took a sip and then set the cup down between them.
As he began to eat his few bites of hamburger, the people around them kept looking over and whispering.
You could tell they were thinking, "That poor old couple - all they can afford is one meal between the two of them."
As the man began to eat his fries, a young man came to the table. He politely offered to buy another meal for the old couple.
The old man said they were just fine - They were used to sharing everything.
The surrounding people noticed the little old lady hadn't eaten a bite.
She sat there watching her husband eat, and occasionally taking turns sipping the drink.
Again the young man came over and begged to let him buy another meal.
This time the old woman said "No, thank you, we are used to sharing everything."
As the old man finished and was wiping his face neatly with the napkin, the young man once again came over to the little old lady, who had yet to eat a single bite of food and asked "What is it you are waiting for?"
She answered

"THE TEETH."


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A boy came to visit his grandparents, and he noticed his grandfather sitting on the porch, in the rocking chair, wearing only a shirt, with nothing on from the waist down.
"Grandpa, what are you doing? Your weenie is out in the wind for everyone to see!" he exclaimed.
The old man looked off in the distance without answering .
"Grandpa, what are you doing sitting out here with nothing on below the waist?" he asked again. The old man slowly looked at him and said, "Well...last week I sat out here with no shirt on, and I got a stiff neck. This is your grandma's idea."

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An elderly woman and her little grandson, whose face was sprinkled with bright freckles spent the day at the zoo.
Lots of children were waiting in line to get their cheeks painted by a local artist who was decorating them with tiger paws.
"You've got so many freckles, there's no place to paint!" a girl in the line said to the little fella.
Embarrassed, the little boy dropped his head.
His grandmother knelt down next to him "I love your freckles.
When I was a little girl I always wanted freckles," she said, while tracing her finger across the child's cheek. "Freckles are beautiful!"
The boy looked up, "Really?"
"Of course," said the grandmother.
"Why, just name me one thing that's prettier than freckles."
The little boy thought for a moment, peered intensely into his grandma's face,
and softly whispered, "Wrinkles."
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8 Comments:

Blogger Merle said...

Hi Jan ~~ These are great. I liked the last one best Wrinkles. And I like the potos of The Devil's Marbles.
I hope you get a good report tomorrow
at the doctor. Will be thinking of you.
Take care, Merle.

June 29, 2006 2:03 am  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Those are wonderful, thanks for the giggles :-)

June 29, 2006 5:57 am  
Blogger Meow (aka Connie) said...

Thanks for making me laugh ... they are classics.
Take care, Meow

June 29, 2006 10:33 am  
Blogger Cuppa said...

Wrinkles! I love it.

June 29, 2006 10:36 am  
Blogger Peter said...

My step brother Gary once told me that my Dad and I looked like two peas in a pod, except for the wrinkles, "Your Dad doesn't have any."
Nice one Gary.

June 29, 2006 11:38 am  
Blogger Merle said...

Dear Jan ~~ I am so very happy for you and can understand you feeling on top of
the world. Now no more of that please, can't stand the strain. Love, Merle.

June 30, 2006 7:16 pm  
Blogger Merle said...

Hi again Jan ~~ Thanks for your comments on the pasta salad. It is yummy and easy. I usually use a whole chicken and then it's a complete meal. Peter said I
spoilt it by putting the pasta in it !!
No accounting for taste. Cheers, Merle.

June 30, 2006 10:04 pm  
Blogger Wystful1 said...

Love 'em....just love 'em!!!

I laughed a lot.
But.......ahhhhhhhhhh, how sweet is the last?

Thanks for sharing these, they made my day.

June 30, 2006 11:38 pm  

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